Are You Struggling With Uncertainty About Who You Are or What You Want?

Do you wake up feeling anxious or depressed, not wanting to face the day? Do you have things that you want to get done in your life that you can’t seem to get started? Maybe you’re going through the motions of daily life with a feeling of internal unrest, dissatisfied with yourself or your situation. Has your relationship left you feeling uncared for and unsupported or in a state of codependency? Or perhaps you focus on caring for and worrying about other people to the point that you stop taking time for yourself. You may put your energy into how you look or how others see you instead of how to feel better about yourself. Do you wonder if you have lost your sense of who you are?

When you don’t have a strong sense of self, when you didn’t learn in your family who you are or how to trust, what you find is that relationships both professional and personal can be very challenging.  You might be in a relationship where you feel unimportant and powerless. Maybe you are in a job that you find unsatisfying or overwhelming. Perhaps you try to conceal your fears by responding to conflict passively or with excessive anger. Do you wish you could more effectively deal with the obstacles and conflict in your life, stop your pain and find a clear, meaningful and satisfying path forward?

We All Face Difficult Times in Our Lives

Everyone goes through times in their lives when they feel overwhelmed, sad, fearful or in emotional pain and need to overcome challenges. These difficulties often come up in our relationships, but we may also experience times of pain, fear and sadness when we are alone.

The choices we make and the way we experience life and our place in it are often a result of what we learned about life and ourselves as we interacted with others in our childhood. For instance, if you felt unsupported, unseen and unimportant growing up you may have that same feeling about yourself as an adult. You are more likely then to unconsciously choose relationships where you feel isolated, lonely and undervalued. The tendency will be to repeat patterns and behaviors that you developed growing up in order to feel safe.  Unfortunately, the strategies you used as a child are rarely effective as an adult.

The good news is that through individual counseling you can learn to understand how your history and patterns of behavior play a role in your personal and relationship challenges. With help, you can use these new understandings to create authentic and lasting change in your life.

Individual Counseling Can Help You Feel Satisfied and Fulfilled

Many of the difficulties you are facing are symptoms – rather than the cause – of your struggles. Simply changing your ineffective or damaging behavior may not create the lasting change you want or need. For this reason, I work with you to understand and address the root issues behind your current challenges. This can be difficult, but it is important that you take each challenge as a learning experience and stay committed to your growth. As you learn to do things differently over time, you can build a better life.

In our first session, we go through your history. Looking at your history can take the pressure off you as you begin to see why you think, feel and act the way you do. It is what I call the “no wonder” experience. Understanding your past is not a question of how others loved you or not. It’s not about placing blame. Rather, it is about becoming aware of how your history has shaped you. You likely don’t have a perfect history, but no one does. And when you become aware of this, you can begin to feel empowered enough to step away from harmful patterns of behavior and take better care of yourself.

In our sessions, I provide a safe, compassionate environment where your needs, thoughts and experiences are accepted and valued. I will connect with your situation as deeply as possible and tailor our therapy process to meet your specific goals and needs. I will also provide tools to help you express yourself in ways you couldn’t as a child, such as writing and guided imagery. These tools can help you learn more about yourself and your relationship to others. If your current situation involves addiction, I might suggest that you consider a 12-step recovery program like Alcoholics Anonymous to provide a valuable support system in conjunction with individual counseling.

Adult counseling can help you explore the personal and relationship challenges you are experiencing and take steps to feel more confident and fulfilled in your life.

But, you may still have questions or concerns about individual counseling…

Don’t you have to be crazy to seek counseling?

While therapy can help treat serious mental disorders, it can also be used by individuals – or couples – to make changes in their lives. Your concern is a common one, but the issues that are coming up in your life – and the pain that you are feeling – are things everyone struggles with. With individual counseling, you can create a life that is both satisfying and meaningful.

Isn’t therapy expensive?

It is important to remember that individual therapy is an investment in yourself and in your well-being. If you are unhappy or unsatisfied, if you feel powerless or constantly afraid, individual counseling can help you feel better. This is an investment worth making. Although I do not accept insurance, I will provide a super bill for you to submit to your insurance company. Please check with your provider to determine reimbursement.

I don’t have time to come in every week…

It can be difficult finding time away from obligations and responsibilities to take care of yourself. You may feel as though you are letting other people down when you take time to manage your own well-being and personal development. I will work with you to find a process and meeting schedule you are able to commit to.

You Can Feel Confident and Comfortable In Your Life

For more than 30 years, I have helped individuals achieve a variety of personal development and relationship goals.  If you are ready to begin your work, or if you have any questions about individual counseling, please call me at (909) 815-0762.